Reflections on 2023
Now that 2023 is coming to a close, I wanted to offer you all some of the ways I am looking back in the hopes that we can look back together.
Becoming a mom has been the identity shift I have been looking for, but not always in the easiest ways. Giving my life and time to this new being has brought me to my own edges in my relationship to myself and all the relationships in my life, including my work. My work has always felt purposeful and meaningful. Sabina’s entrance into the world has added new layers into the importance of doing this work, building this community, and facilitating spaces for others to do this work.
I am really sinking into the idea that self care is community care. A bubble bath doesn’t mean anything if there’s a screaming baby in the background. Taking time for ourselves is sometimes easier said than done. I cannot believe how my community has stepped up to take care of our family this year. It has forced me to face my enneagram 2 instincts around receiving when you have nothing to give. Being in a season of receiving is more vulnerable, more tender. You have to face your wounds and fears around opening up to what others are offering. You have to admit you need the help, that you have limits, that you are not (in fact) superhuman.
This year I have cancelled things. I have forgotten things. I have no showed. I have showed up fresh from a shower with my hair soaking wet. I have not been who I used to be. Learning to accept this version of me that I do not yet know fully is and will continue to impact the way I show up in community.
One of the most beautiful things about 2023 was to witness how the people that I have worked with this year have blossomed into their Self energies. Things are happening for them that I have heard about for years. Watching dreams come true is a special privilege and I feel like this year I got to witness a lot of that.
My word theme for 2023 was miracle and I believe that is exactly what I got. A lot of miracles. We got into a head on collision and we all 3 came out healthy and with a new car. We had a traumatic birth and we came out with our beautiful Sabina. We hit our capacity and our community surrounded us. Miracles.
Some things I am considering for 2024 and maybe you would too:
What has worked well this year and how can I integrate that into my life next year?
What is one thing I hope happens next year?
What do I want to feel in 2024?
What loose ends do I want to tie up, let go of, get right with before the end of 2023?